December 31, 2010

Dear mama,

How are you today? Anything exciting for tonight? We're going to spend our evening in Tacoma with a few of our favorites. We're having pupu's & desserts & drinks. We thought about going to dinner, but i'm not sure if everyone else is going to dinner too, we don't want to be caught up in the crowds, we just want to hang out & enjoy eachothers company.

I can't believe how fast the year went by. I've been reading past blogs that i've written about this time last year. I remember just kind of going through the motions of everything. No real

Christmas spirit. No real excitement for the new year. All the days were just that...just another day.

Throughout the year, i've shed many tears thinking about what used to be. The things we did. The things you said. The way you said them & they made no sense & then we'd all laugh. I think often about the games that you came up with & how it involved everyone no matter what their ages were. I think about all the things that you did & how you did them so well & with ease. It just all came so easily to you & i wish they did the same for me.

In the last few weeks, I feel like the things that you used to do year after year are fading & are not....represented. So this coming new year, in 2011, i'd like to focus on 2 events that were so "you." The halau easter egg hunt & the Christmas party.

Also, i've been thinking back on life when i was younger, elementary school, junior high & high school. Trying to remember the way things were back then. The daily routines, the chores, the things we did....all of it. I'm not sure why i've been hung up on these things, maybe because i'm trying to remember & re-create things with Ry & Nunu. I'm not sure.

Another thing that i've caught myself doing A LOT of lately, is writing things in my spiral notebook. After you passed we found a massive amount (ok, so it wasn't a massive amount, but still it was between 6-9) of spiral notebooks around the house & halau. They all were not filled, but each notebook was filled with ideas that you had, reminders of things, etc. And as I look through mine...it is filled with the same things...

My To-Do List....

My Grocery List

What I Want to do with my Tax Return

Yep. I almost feel like i'm just giving myself a big old headache doing this, but I don't like when I think of something & then can't remember it. So i've resorted to writing pretty much anything down. You'd be proud. LOL

Anyway, I hope that your New Year celebration is wonderful & full of lots of games. I love you so much & miss you every single day.

Happy new year....

Photo taken December 31, 2007, bringing in 2008